#136 Things to share over coffee

November 2024

Hello friend,

Would you believe I actually nearly forgot that I had to write this post this month.

November has gone by so fast I didn’t realise this week was the last of the month.

Does that ever happen to you? You get into the zone of work, family, and other commitments, and you don’t realise how quickly time has passed.

I guess it comes from having too many things on my plate. When I try to balance everything, I become a little too overwhelmed, and then I just become absorbed by everyday life. It's kind of scary to be able to hyper-fixate on things and then zone out on the passing of time.

I’m trying to learn to do less, prioritise things that I still want, and not be too hard on myself when I get behind.

I hope you are winding down the year, happily putting off new projects until next year and simply enjoying the moment.

Now, let me get to what I’ve been doing this month.

I’ve cancelled all of my streaming services to get me off the screen and be less distracted regarding my writing and reading. I’m happy to report that it’s been working well. The result is that I’ve been doing tons more reading this month, so much so that I feel my cup of inspiration has been filled. And now all I feel like doing is writing. I hope to do more and more writing until the end of the year.

I still have a problem with spending too much time on social media, especially Instagram, but I have set a daily time limit and have been sticking to it.

I have been watching more of our tutorials on YouTube. This past month, thanks to the Pod Sound School’s YouTube page, I've been learning more about podcasting. Their advice and videos on the practical side of podcasting and how you can podcast have been very informative and helpful.

One particular video from the Pod Sound School also addressed stage fright and anxiety. The video was titled "Overcoming Recording Anxiety: Two Proven Techniques to Record with Confidence." 

In the video, the host, Veronica, suggested using two different techniques. 

The first one, the Colombian Tia Technique, is basically about just jumping in and doing it, particularly when it comes to going live or live streaming. Often, once you jump in and do it and start talking without overthinking what you want to say, the anxiety will go away. This school of thought is jumping into the deep end, and you will sink or swim. Usually, you can do a very awkward doggy paddle as long as you get through it, which I think is excellent advice.

The other idea, called the Beyoncé alter ego technique, is interesting. It involves creating a character you can play as an actor would so you can trick your subconscious into believing it’s not actually you performing. It sounds enjoyable, and many popular artists and singers invent these on-stage personas to help them perform with less fear or anxiety.

Well, this month, I’ve been dedicating time mostly to audiobooks. I’ve just about finished Miriam Margolyes's memoir titled This Much is True, narrated by herself. I’ve been enjoying this audiobook, and having a memoir read by the subject adds another dimension to the story. You get a real sense of the person's voice. 

Miriam Margolyes is a legendary English actress and national treasure who is probably best known for her role in the Harry Potter movies. She has worked in many diverse areas, such as radio plays, theatre, film, and her one-woman show. 

The memoir itself is filled with her charm and erudite way of telling stories. She is a natural-born accouter with a unique ability to recall details, and her ability with accents is fantastic. She is a master sketcher of character, and her reflections of her personal family history recalled from her point of view with her formidable character, energy, emotion, and vitality are charming. Her ability and desire to be different and stand out while making people laugh, with her innate curiosity, warmth, charm, and openness, have enamoured her many.

Having this unforgettable woman reading to me his month has been fantastic company. I feel as if we’ve been having a conversation, and it’s been a lovely, honest, warm and in-depth conversation, something so rare these days.

I’ve been reading a lot. Unfortunately, I can’t share everything that I read unless, of course, you’d like me to do a post dedicated only to my books. Perhaps I should start doing a monthly reading review. If my reading level keeps going at this level, I might just be able to do that.

One of the books I finished this month is The Art of Laziness, written and published by The Library Mindset. It’s a slim little volume of about 120 pages.

I don’t particularly like the title because it sounds like an insult. I hate the idea that people call out laziness as if it’s something negative to be chastised for. I have a problem with that word. Laziness or being lazy isn’t about being slothful. More often than not, procrastination is a response to trauma or anxiety.

So apart from the title with terminology that I don’t particularly like I found this book to be filled with wonderful little quotes and different methods to overcome the fear and negative talk that can be the ingrained cause of procrastination. 

It’s a great little book. You could sit down and read it in one day, filled with wonderful quotes and explanations about the psychology of procrastination. It is pretty helpful, so I suggest that if you are feeling in a bit of a slump or are a victim of procrastination, this is probably a great book to read. It will give you a pep talk and some real help with the bad habit of procrastination.

Right now, I’m a bit tired of reading fiction, so I’ve been trying to get into more nonfiction. This month, I’ve grabbed a few nonfiction books to read simply because I haven’t read that much nonfiction this year, and it’s good for your reading habits, I think. 

The world of fiction is great for escapism and creativity, but I don’t think you are doing yourself a favour by reading only one genre or type of writing.

Doctors and scientists write many beautiful books about different areas of study. 

I’ve chosen to start areat book about psychology written by Dr Alan Hopper who is a professor at Harvard medical school and Raymond Adams who is a clinician at Women’s Hospital in Boston. The book is called Reaching Down the Rabbit Hole: extraordinary journeys into the human brain.

I’m only a few pages in, but I already get a sense of these doctors' dedication to their patients. The way they write about each patient's situation and explain the psychology or the science behind their particular condition is filled with empathy and a certain level of respect and care for the individual. 

I’m looking forward to reading more chapters and learning more about the human brain's workings.

One of the books that has been on my to-be red list for months is Ernest Hemingway’s novella A Movable Feast. 

I finally managed to get a copy off Amazon and have been really savouring every word and phrase in every chapter of this slim volume. 

Hemingway’s writing is lovely, but I can’t get enough of him. I’ve also ordered his novel for whom the Bell Tolls, as I haven’t read much of Hemingway. 

I had to read The Old Man and the Sea in high school, but I really haven’t read much of Hemingway’s other work so I’m looking forward to getting into his other major works.

Getting to A Movable Feast, which is basically a short memoir about Hemingway's memories as an unknown writer living in 1920s Paris, is very much a journey back in time while also giving a real sense of Hemingway's personality as a writer.

You get a wonderful sense of the general tone, colour, and ambience of this wonderfully romantic historical time in the Parisian city itself. You can feel as if you were sitting beside Hemingway as he explores the city with his young wife while meeting characters of the time, including literary stars like James Joyce, Scott Fitzgerald, Ezra Pound, and the art critic and writer Gertrude Stone. 

It’s a very romantic recollection of that period in history and that time of his life when he was starting to find his voice as a writer and when he was indeed a starving artist. Reading A Movable Feast makes you wish that the Paris of Hemingway still existed, a beautiful, poetic, truthful account of this time of his life and excellent insights into the world of creativity.

My favourite quote so far comes from the second chapter titled Miss Stein Instructs when Hemingway is plagued with the worry of starting a new story, he writes:

‘Sometimes when I was starting a new story and I could not get it going, I would sit in front of the fire and squeeze the peel of the little oranges into the edge of the flame and watch the sputter of blue that they made. I would stand and look out over the roofs of Paris and think, ‘Do not worry. You have always written before, and you will write now. All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the sentence you know. So, finally, I would write one true sentence and then go on from there.’

This month, I also renewed my subscription to The Paris Review, a literary journal that features contemporary prose, interviews, poetry, and art. 

I got my first fall issue, and I’m just loving it. It is such an elegant publication filled with so much great contemporary writing. It’s terrific to see interviews besides short stories, and there is an insight into writers' work, perspectives, experiences, and art.

I’m delighted I renewed my subscription. It’s been a few years but I can see myself really relishing and enjoying this refreshing intellectual and cultural journal. I can’t wait to get into it a little bit more.

The other night, I found myself going back to making art. For some reason, I seem to have gotten out of the habit of sitting down and sketching on my iPad or in my notebooks.

I’ve gotten out of the habit of being creative in different ways rather than just with words. It’s refreshing to be innovative in another medium. It is helpful to revive your sense of feeling burnt out and tired towards the end of the year.

Making art and, in particular, making collages is something I do to distract myself and take myself outside of my brain. Making a physical collage takes me off the screen, away from the pen and paper, and looking at something visually. It is restful to my mind and pleasant to my person and my eyes.

I’m also very much a magpie in the sense that a magpie goes out and steals different things and hoards little treasures and shiny little objects. I have quite an extensive collection of papers, magazines, fabrics, photos, and other objects that can be used in collages. 

I will try to dedicate at least once a week, maybe one evening during the week, to making a physical collage. It’s pretty relaxing, and I think I’m getting quite good at it.

It’s a good sign when you are able to take a look at your work and think that’s not too bad.

So here is something that I made this week that I think isn’t too bad.

I like writing in my notebook. I wouldn’t say I’m a regular journaler or someone who starts off the day with their dear diary, but I do enjoy it. 

Even the act of brain-dumping things onto the page is refreshing and liberating. It helps me get rid of all my thoughts because sometimes I overthink and become trapped in them. 

I live very much in my head which at times is quite pleasant but other times can be overwhelming. And since we’re getting towards the end of the year I do feel particularly overwhelmed, so scribbling in my notebook is like having a conversation with a friend. Quite often when I get into the flow of writing I find my subconscious is somehow giving advice to me as a person. I’m unsure where the words come from, but some of my scribbles are helpful.

Here is one of my favorite scribbles from this month:

‘This is a one-off exclusive, never to be repeated performance—a one-time offer made especially for you. Don’t waste your time; we only have one life, so tell her you love her. Tell him your feelings because love is all that matters. When you take that final breath, it isn’t going to be about money that comes and goes or about all those trophies nice and shiny but without substance. It’s going to be about those smiles, the belly laughs, the connections you’ve made, the people who lifted you up and those you lift. So have a good show give it all you got put your heart and soul into it all. But save a little happiness for yourself. Life is also a marathon, and you’ve got to fill your well up with water; otherwise, you’ll be all dried up and won’t have anything to give. And you’ve got to provide; otherwise, you’re not going to get it all back.’

This is all I have on my mind for now.

I’ll be back soon with more stories and reflections. 

Take care of yourself, and thanks for letting me share what’s on my mind.

Regards from

Rochelle

Sometimes, I talk about Sicily.

Other times, I talk about whatever is on my mind.

My writing is always about lightning, the mental load, and sharing my thoughts.

I hope you enjoy the randomness of A Load Off My Mind. 

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